One of these days I won't have to do it all. I know I don't do it all, I just can't do it all.
I gave up trying I started going crazy. As much as I love having a clean house and to have everything in it's place. My children undo all of my work. If I get the laundry put away.
SUCCESS! If I get my daughter out the door on time for schoool SUCCESS!
If I keep my cool when my son climbs on top of the table and empties a box of cheerios...SUCCESS!

This is when I ask myself seriously, is it worth trying? Well, yes to keep things livable, but not perfect. I need to stop being mortified when my house is dirty and people come over. For goodness sakes I am only human. I have to admit I hit a wall at least once a month where I don't want to do it anymore. Be a mom, yes, clean, no! If I where being paid for my job I would have been fired, for not fulfilling all my duties. However, My duties to clean the house are not the only thing in my job description.

My kids are bathed and happy today! HAPPY! That is my job. I am to be happpy, help my children feel loved and have a happy life. That is, on somedays, a very tough job. They are not loveable always (MOST OF THE TIME they are) but not always.
I think I have been lucky, my kids are good most of the time. I think they have to be or I wouldn't be able to handle it. I do not always have a lot of patience.


Okay, so I went to the store yesterday to hit the case lot sale, (spagettios, mac and cheese, who doesn't need a storage room full of these goodies). It always starts out pretty good, then my one year old escapes his straps yet again. So I am having to hold him down. 5 year old needs to go potty although we went before we left the house. Rush to the bathroom, get that done, now back to the shopping. 3 year old announces I need to go potty. (FRUSTRATION) Yes, I should have taken her with my 5 year old, I figured she'd gone right before also. Again we treck to the bathroom, CLOSED FOR CLEANING...no please not now. Upstairs open not going to work for me. I have a gocery cart full can't leave it. The worker let us use it anyway. I love when people understand children's needs. NOW I AM ASKING MYSELF, "WHY DO I TRY?"
The drama is done and we are at home. Alone, I put kids to bed (Hubby's on a bussiness trip).
Watch T.V. fall asleep and wake up to start over again.

When I wake up I find my toddler talking to himself as I come in to get him....A BIG GRIN! "HAH!" he says (that is hi) as I pick him up and he just bubbles with excitement to be alive another day! That is what it is about! THAT IS IT! My excitement wears thin as time presses on. As laundry piles up, and the dishes grow like mushrooms in the rain.
When I get that moment from my kids that excitement to just be alive, I too can make it another day, or even just one more minute. NOT for my dishes, or laundry. But to stop, play outside, read, play and love the moments that fly away so quickly.

A fun Mommy note:

I love my Hubby and it is fun to watch him be Daddy.
I think he is so attractive when he is playing with the kids on the floor and building towers or playing ponies with my kids.
I love listening to him read a story using funny voices and sounds, laughing and playing with the children. That is a sexy man to me.

My Cape is Torn

I suited up to start my day

My boots, my belt and my stretchy tights.

My cape is the last to adorn,

But low and behold my cape is torn.

How it ripped I do not know,

Let me think, how did the day go?

Did it tear as I rescued a cat from a tree?

Or did the hole come from the fire,

Or maybe when I stopped a train that got free.

Or caught the theif as he tripped on a wire.

NO, I did the dishes yesterday!

I Did the laundry, cleaned the floors and gave my kids a bath.

I did the shopping, paid the bills, planned a menu, cooked the meals.

Balanced the budget, washed the car, sang to my baby "twinkle little star".

Bandaged a knee, wiped a tear, toddler walked- gave a cheer.

Changed some diapers lost count at ten only to do it all again.

Added to my pile to mend, Some jeans, some socks and one "special friend."

Built a tower knocked it down.

Fixed a broken princess crown.

Somewhere in that super day my cape was torn I cannot say.

So I toss again to my growing pile my cape for the mending.

I won't get to that for a while.

Even in my day of glory the best part of my super story,

The hugs and the kisses, laughs and the smiles.

I feel like a hero and can fly for miles.

Why I started this blog...

I have been inspired to write my daily successes and daily struggles of being a Stay at Home Mom.

I have been reading Dr. Laura's book "In Praise of Stay-at-Home Moms".
I have been really enjoying this book.
It has, so far, been an inspiring message as I am a SAHM (Stay-at-home-mom).

I have been at home with my kids since my oldest Madi was born.
I knew as did my husband that this was the way that we wanted it to be.
Almost 6 years and three children later, I haven't worked outside of my home.
Have I loved every minute of it? NO!
Am I grateful to have the chance to be at home? YES! YES! YES!
Don't ask me that question when I am scrubbing throw up out of carpets, or have reached my limit with the KIDS! YES, I have limits, don't we all?
Anyone who knows me, has seen me reach that limit.
Let's just say that a pregnant hot tired mom and a 2 1/2 year old do not mix.
That is just one scene, there are many almost daily.

I would like to start my Diary with success of today, and hey it is only 11:00 in the Morning!
I made french toast this morning for breakfast (not something I could do if I was headed to work.) I got a "fantastic and terrific" and 20 points for the days breakfast- don't know how the points work out. But it must have been good because I have never received points before.
(Though I am sure I have deserved them on other occassions.)

I have also been thinking a lot about Dr. Laura's book, this has changed my attitude a bit.
I need to rest more. Dr. Laura told me too. This is so that I can make my home a sanctuary. A place of refuge and when my husband comes home he can feel that I am not stressed, over tired or overworked so that I can be his WIFE too.

I am not home with my children to make the house perfect but to make my house a "perfect home." Doesn't mean it is clean in every corner, or all the laundry is folded and put away.
But I have stopped to play with my beautiful children. To help my baby learn to walk.
Read the book that my 3 year old picked out for just she and I to read together, and answer my five year olds questions (There are many).
Taking that time yesterday to play with my children and give them what they needed meant I had to choose not to take a shower. (Don't worry I got one today! Another success I'd say!)

I also got to thinking, with all the things that I do day to day, I don't think I could ever make time to work....I don't know how anyone can do it.

I am just gratefull I don't have to.